Change of Mind

thinkingMind power is a phrase we hear constantly and most of us acknowledge its importance but we really have no idea of the infinite capacity of our minds. We only use 10% (and my 10% is full!) and the rest is hidden, even from us. The remaining 90% is subconscious which means we only have the rest to ‘think’ with.

That 10% can be used for conscious mind power, the kind we can make use of on a daily basis to make our lives more dynamic and rewarding.

To harness mind power, we need conscious awareness and choice.


This doesn’t have to be formal. Anything which stills the mind and helps us connect to our inner selves counts as meditation. The more we relate to our higher wisdom, the better we can de-clutter the rubbish from our minds and the desires of our hearts. I watched Elementary last night, where Holmes is forced to go to Rehab meetings…even he said that we have a finite amount of space in our brain, so we shouldn’t fill it with rubbish!67. meditationYou can meditate to music, a beautiful scene, a colour, a guide. All you need is to relax and feel the silence within. Insights will come and, hopefully, a sense of calm and peace. You can use this time to visualise a person, situation or object you desire. Visualisation is very powerful and is a wonderful way to harness mind power. By seeing yourself in a future scenario but feeling it as achieved, you bring the desired closer. Although using mind power is about focus and concentration, so is meditation and the latter is an effective way to practise these skills. Both need discipline.

The more in tune you are with your higher self, the better you will manage your life in every area. Tuning into your intuition is vital for mental health and a happy life because your brain is full of faulty information and your emotions will lead you astray but your inner wisdom is always pure and right. If you sit quietly and ask, you will get answers. The mind is not your brain. The mind has many aspects and by trusting the instinctive messages you receive when meditating, you will feel the power you have at your disposal. The more you learn and practise, the more you will trust it and see proof of its positive impact on your life. The clearer your mind, the better will be your choices, feelings, decisions. The mind regulates your emotions as well. A lot of people don’t know that. That’s why they say they can’t help how they feel. Actually, we can decide how we want to feel and how we want to react to that feeling. Surely knowing why we do things is crucial – our conscious choice – rather than lurching from one self-defeating act to another.


Positive statements to affirm the life we want are a very powerful tool because they literally change our minds. Decide which area of your life is not working for you then write yourself an affirmation that you can use as a mantra. Say it faithfully without judgement or expectation and results will begin to show in your tangible reality. A lot of people give up after saying an affirmation for a week or two because nothing appears to be changing but that’s where faith comes in.

Before we can understand how to use affirmations to effect positive change in our lives, we need to grasp the role of conditioning and the mind’s power. Right from when we first come into the world and start to operate as part of a family, initially and then in the wider society, we absorb words, attitudes, ideas, thoughts, feelings and energies from all around us. Sad to say, many of these will be negative as we live in a fear-based society. Many of our well-worn adages are created from a fear of lack and loss, such as “Money doesn’t grow on trees”, or “Waste not, want not.” I’m not saying these proverbs aren’t true, but they engender negative ideas which form our sense of reality. This early conditioning stays with us all through our lives and just think about how many social ills can be traced back to these beliefs – racism, sexism, ageism, bigotry of all kinds, discrimination, limitation thinking, all kinds of fear, addictions, self-hatred, hatred, violence, crime and, of course, war. Now try to imagine a world in which positive affirmations form the basis for our belief systems and think how different things would be. If you’re already thinking this is “too good to be true”, there’s another negative belief! What about “Life wasn’t meant to be easy”? Life was meant to be to be easy – if we would only let it be.

Okay, we can’t cure the world’s problems, but we can do something about our own individual lives and, hopefully, influence others positively in the process. What I’m suggesting is that if we can learn negative thoughts in childhood, through the attitudes of our parents, teachers, friends and everyone around us, we can just as easily learn positive ideas, or, in the case of adults, we have to unlearn first. We can achieve both processes at once by using positive affirmations to wipe out the old negative ideas, replacing them with new fresh ones of our own choosing.

For an affirmation to be effective, you need the following conditions:

  • use the first person singular, “I”, when saying them
  • only use the present tense
  • they must be said with conviction and repeated often
  • they must be specific
  • write your own if possible and keep to one area at a time
  • phrase them simply

Here’s an example of how you might put these rules into effect. Let’s say you want more money in your life; it’s no good saying the words, “more money would be good” as that just constitutes a wish. For it to be an affirmation and for it to work, you need to use “I”, then put it definitely in the present and say how much you want but phrasing it as if you already have it. So it would be, “I have $50 more a week in my pay packet”, or “I have $2000 in my savings account.” It’s no use just saying, for instance, “I have more money” as you might then trip over a five cent coin which would fulfil your affirmation! You might have to repeat your affirmation like a mantra for months or even years, depending on how much pre-conditioning you have to break down first (I have been using ‘I am skinny and beautiful’ off and on for years – I’m still hoping my mind catches on to this!). Others might change your life overnight. This also tells you a lot about which ones are your most entrenched beliefs.

You need to suspend your cynicism, impatience and attachment to outcomes if you are to work successfully with affirmations. You might feel silly at first, saying, “I am a wealthy person” when you know quite definitely you are not! But by saying this statement over and over, you are changing your thoughts in this area of your life and the reality of your life will also begin to change.

old-lady-wheel-chair-ballerinaPick the issue you want to work on most urgently then write an affirmation of your own that suits the need. Keep saying it constantly – in the shower, in the car, as you’re cooking, all the time. Out loud is best but when not possible, run it in your mind. Affirmations don’t have to be in the form of words. You can affirm in mind pictures which is more like creative visualisation and that works very well for some people. You can also live your life as one extended affirmation, by actions and thoughts in general which enhance your blossoming beliefs.

Affirmations require faith and self-love but most of all, deservability. Without these components, you cannot change your life for the better. You can also say group affirmations such as “My family is well and happy.”

Here are some areas of life that can improve with the help of affirmations:

  • Health: “I have a body that works perfectly.”
  • Job: “My job is enjoyable and pays me well.”
  • Money: “I have all the money I need every day.”
  • Relationships: “All my relationships are positive and joyful.”
  • Future: “My future is bright and safe.”
  • Life: “My life is continual bliss.”

These are generic ones that you can use to make a start but if you have a specific issue such as a particular relationship that needs healing, write an affirmation for it such as, “My daughter and I get along beautifully together” or “My boss values my work.” The more you affirm that your life is good, the more it will be. It’s about taking responsibility for your own life and making choices about the way you want that life to be.


One of the clearest ways to see the effects of positive mind power is in the area of manifesting. We hear a lot these days about “the laws of attraction” and how they can be used to manifest our conscious and subconscious desires. It works best for me when I think of something I want then forget about it. It just turns up in its own time. When we try to control the “how” and the “when”, it doesn’t seem to work, perhaps because we’re not letting go and letting the Universe do its job. Positivity involves trust in Self and the goodness of life. Synchronicity cannot be controlled. It’s magic and to connect to it, just set your mind to getting what you want then let go.

Using visualisation and affirmations, you can, of course, manifest more deliberately but still it’s no use holding your breath waiting for the Universe to deliver. Attachment to outcomes can actually delay the very thing we want, not to mention that we don’t always want what’s good for us! Stay positive no matter how long you need to wait and it will come.

Positive Thinking


Using the power of your mind, you can turn negative into positive, whether it’s in the form of worrying, bad habits, addictions, toxic behaviour or unhealthy relationships. All these can be turned around by sheer will and determination.

There’s a lot of myth surrounding this philosophy. It’s not about burying your head in the sand and saying everything is wonderful. It’s about finding the gift within the unpleasant, the tragic, the disappointing and so on. There’s always a gift – always – sometimes very obvious, sometimes hidden. Seek and you shall find!

You can also manifest your wishes, be healthier and happier, feel empowered and make positive choices in your life. This only requires the confidence that comes with exercising your immense power both in your mind and in your soul. Something is only good or bad because you think it’s so. When confronted with hurt, betrayal, loss, illness or anything else you don’t like, decide it’s okay and it will be.

I think I can! I think I can!

I think I can! I think I can!

You have huge power that is accessible every day of your life, in good times and challenging times. There are many ways to harness this power and make it work for you. The benefits are huge. No matter what your nature is, you can achieve a positive mental attitude by deciding that’s what you want then practising every day to reach that goal.

As Donald Trump says, “If you have to think, think big.”

Don’t Mind Me…

249. stressing out (1)Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) is a program that helps you learn to calm your mind and body to help you cope, not only with illness and/or pain, but also with stress in your everyday life.

MBSR teaches “mindfulness,” a focus only on things happening in the present moment. For example, you may sit quietly and think only about how your body feels. You might focus only on the sounds around you or how your food tastes and smells. When you are mindful, you do just one thing and you pay close attention to that one thing (basically, the opposite of multi-tasking).

To help you focus your mind on the present:


Stop everything! EVERYTHING! PAUSE…BREATHE! Allow everything to be exactly as it is, Release all resistance and attachment

chronic comic 164Imagine yourself hanging on to whatever you’re holding on to, with your hands, for dear life, with a big black hole beneath you. Now, LET GO and allow yourself to fall, fall down the black hole, keep falling, until you land on a beautiful, soft platform of golden light. The Universe, God, or whatever you might believe in holds you, loves you and supports you. ALLOW IT!


Breathe…feel your body.

Breathe some more.

Breathe all the way down to your feet. Feel your feet touching the floor, wiggle your toes, push your big toes into the floor. Breathe deeply, sigh or groan as you breathe out. Try this at least 10 times.

What are you actually feeling?

Feel it! Express it! if you need to cry or scream, do it – it will leave you SO much lighter.


chronic comic 163Not necessarily meditation or a formal way of relaxation – I mean do something you LOVE and can fully engage with, which will switch off your mind chatter (it can still be meditation if that is what you love).


Open up to new possibilities.

73. miserableAsk questions without having specific answers in mind already, and without wanting them answered immediately. Simply ask and then forget about it. Allow space after the question, to free yourself from intellectualising it, and rather to be free to receive the answers when they come.

Questions like:

    • What else is possible?
    • What would the energy of my life be like, if I was living it for the joy of it?
    • How could this situation be even better?

Studies show that MBSR can reduce stress and help people relax. MBSR helped some people cope better with symptoms and improved their quality of life. Research also shows that MBSR helped people sleep better and feel less anxious, and it helped ease depression symptoms.

Hard-ly Positive

Well, the Month of Affirmations have come and gone (as has last year). I don’t know how any of you are feeling (no feedback? nothing? I feel like I’m in a relationship!) but it all seems to have been wasted on me.

I went into the month with the absolute best of intentions. I cleaned my house. I bought (and cleaned/cleared) my crystals.* I bought a set of Louise Hay’s Wisdom Cards to have by the door – the idea was to pull one out each day and let it guide me.

wisdom cards

*My Crystals

Bloodstone: Centring and grounding. Brings mystical energies of increasing adaptability and organization, & lessening confusion, stress, & anxiety. Releasing blockages. Good for helping emotional traumas and grief. Good to have several pieces in the home to increase the flow of life energy.

eggsCarnelian: Stabilising, restores vitality & motivation, stimulates creativity.  It gives courage, promotes positive life choices, and dispels apathy. Overcomes negative conditioning & improves self-esteem. Improves analytic abilities, clarifies perception, sharpens concentration. Calms anger, banishes emotional negativity and replaces it with a love of life. Stimulates sexuality. Treats neuralgia & depression. Accelerates healing in bones and ligaments.  Improves vitamin & mineral absorption. Ensures good blood supply to organs & tissues.

Jade: Calms the nervous system. Cleanses the blood. Removes toxins. Excellent stone for the kidneys.

Malachite: Balance, abundance, manifestation & intention.  Amplifies energies of all kinds, both positive & negative. Absorbs energy and draws emotions to the surface.

Ruby Fuchsite: Balancing stimulation with intuition. Brings about awareness of problems of all kinds & use this awareness to find solutions. Helps one understand Love at a Higher level. Helpful with ailments where body functions are out of balance. Amplifying.

Unakite: Balances emotions with spirituality. Provides grounding when needed. Facilitates rebirthing, gently releasing conditions that inhibit spiritual & psychological growth. Supports convalescence & recovery from major illness.

Chinese Lapis: Encourages clarity & objectivity. Allows the release of stress bringing deep inner peace. Facilitate self-knowledge & self-expression. Helps overcome depression, lower blood pressure & boosts the immune system & the thyroid. Beneficial for alleviating migraine headaches & insomnia.

Blue lace agate: Gentle, calming stone that engenders tranquility and grace. Brings with this calm and tranquility a lessening of anger, even deep anger issues, and a calming of nervousness. Considered a happiness stone, as well as one of hope.

Black onyx: Provides strength & support during difficult circumstances. Alleviates fears & worries to help you to feel comfortable within yourself & in your surroundings. Promotes stamina & vigour. Encourages making wise decisions. Promotes self-control to keep excessive emotions & passions under control.

Hematite: Effective grounding stone. Inspires while keeping feet firmly on the ground. Reduces the discomfort of leg cramps & fractures, cleanses the blood & aids blood-related problems.

Pink Agate: Replaces pain with joy, heart healing and heart warming. Calms, comforts and provides security. Eases stress, promotes unconditional love for others and the understanding that you are lovable. Offers positive self-image. (I think everyone needs one of these!)

Amethyst: Aids creative thinking & spiritual awareness. Protective stone. Eases headaches, releases tension, relieves physical & emotional pain. Helps combat addictions. Reduces swellings & bruises.

Botswana Agate: Anti-depressant quality. Promotes understanding the need for deeper meaning. Stimulates the exploration of the unknown & furthers ones quest toward the enlightened state. Soothing & calming qualities. Encourages eternal & constant love. Great for achieving stability & balance. Improves mental functions & helps where issues of clarity and stability are concerned. towerAids smokers who want to quit

Garnet: Promotes good health & vitality. Enhances your love life & sex drive. Fortifies, activates & strengthens the survival instinct. Removes inhibitions. Bestows self-confidence.

Selenite: enhances mental flexibility and enables strong decision-making abilities. Lessens confusion and mental disorientation. A stone of truth and honesty.

But I just continue to be sucked into the vortex that is my life. I know I place myself in positions that I’m sure other people don’t have to deal with – I don’t know how I get here; but I do. I live in a RomCom…but without the happy ending (…so far!).

Now, I sit here watching TV while my housemate, who used to be my lover, and is currently my best friend, texts his new girlfriend (all night); after buying her lingerie while out shopping with me.

Oh….and, I got stood up for a date tonight!

It is so hard to be positive!


To Affirm or Not To Affirm – A Question

lens18041543_1307890912question_mark_purpleSo, after 31 days of affirmations, are you feeling empowered? Reassured? Are you on the way to relinquishing your fears and purging your anger, predicting your own future and living up to your potential?

Or (and be honest) did you find yourself reading the affirmations and feeling all sorts of angry? Feeling forced into positive thinking?

Okay, so it doesn’t work for everybody: it floats some people’s boats and, for others, it has more of a torpedo effect!

Megan Bruneau, from MindBodyGreen, has created a list of reminders (call them whatever you wanna call them), that actually help her live her own best life:

  1. I’m imperfect, like everyone else, and that’s OK. My self-worth is not dependent on an accomplishment, number, or status.

  2. Life is filled with sadness, pain, illness, death, and loss. These are universal human experiences.

  3. Pain is out of my control. Self-compassion is in my control.

  4. I am constantly changing; my world is constantly changing; everything I experience (physical, mental, and emotional) will come and go.

  5. Being perfect is not what connects people. Vulnerability brings us closer together.

  6. If I knew I only had a week to live, I should ask, “what would be important?

  7. There are no “bad” feelings; however, there are unhelpful reactions to difficult feelings. Experiencing uncomfortable feelings doesn’t make something wrong with me, it makes me human.

  8. Playing is not irresponsible; in fact it’s the opposite. Fun is necessary for happiness.

  9. The longest relationship I’ll have in my life is the one with myself. Other people will come and go, but I’ll be with myself from birth until death. The sooner I decide to start being kind to myself, the longer I have to live life supporting rather than undermining myself.

  10. Whatever it is that I’m going through, chances are there are thousands of others going through a similar experience. We’re all in this together.

  11. To ask for help is not a sign of weakness; on the contrary, it’s actually a sign of strength and courage

  12. What’s the worst that can happen? Consider that question. Then ask: “What do I need to survive that?

  13. Things come together and fall apart, and come together and fall apart again. This is what life is.

  14. There are no objective truths. How I perceive myself and my world is flexible and can change.

  15. Acceptance is not about liking, wanting, or condoning. Acceptance can liberate us.

  16. Humans are resilient beings. I am programmed to heal.

  17. We have the ability to find meaning in our suffering. Sometimes it just takes creativity.

  18. What serves another person might not serve me, and vice versa.

  19. Realistic expectations mitigate unnecessary pain, disappointment, and frustration, and my energy changes from moment to moment. I put 80% in everything I do, sometimes more and sometimes less.

  20. I don’t have to “reach my potential” but I will do my best not to sleepwalk through my life.


Basically, you need to do whatever it is that works for you. I will NEVER tell you what to do. I WILL try to give you some ideas to try: maybe some things that have worked for me, or even some things that haven’t. I love to hear what you have to say (although it may be difficult in this forum) and I always welcome your input here, on my Facebook page and with articles in LIVING WELL with FIBROMYALGIA.

I hope that you have all found something that is giving you, at least, a little relief this year; and I look forward to discovering new ways to help each other next year.

fibromodem xmas

Operation Affirmation – Day 31

Affirmations are a way for us to harness the mind’s power by directing your intentions toward our best selves and our happiest lives.

Say this phrase to yourself all day long. Write it down, email it to yourself, and post it where you will see it all day.

Love your day, love yourself, love your life!

Like this affirmation?
Get it on something you will see every day!

Say good-bye to the past and hello to the future:

Happy New Year

Operation Affirmation – Day 30

Affirmations are a way for us to harness the mind’s power by directing your intentions toward our best selves and our happiest lives.

Say this phrase to yourself all day long. Write it down, email it to yourself, and post it where you will see it all day.

Love your day, love yourself, love your life!

Like this affirmation?
Get it on something you will see every day!

Operation Affirmation – Day 29

Affirmations are a way for us to harness the mind’s power by directing your intentions toward our best selves and our happiest lives.

Say this phrase to yourself all day long. Write it down, email it to yourself, and post it where you will see it all day.

Love your day, love yourself, love your life!

Like this affirmation?
Get it on something you will see every day!

Operation Affirmation – Day 28

Affirmations are a way for us to harness the mind’s power by directing your intentions toward our best selves and our happiest lives.

Say this phrase to yourself all day long. Write it down, email it to yourself, and post it where you will see it all day.

Love your day, love yourself, love your life!

Like this affirmation?
Get it on something you will see every day!

Operation Affirmation – Day 27

Affirmations are a way for us to harness the mind’s power by directing your intentions toward our best selves and our happiest lives.

Say this phrase (another one of my favourites!) to yourself all day long. Write it down, email it to yourself, and post it where you will see it all day.

Love your day, love yourself, love your life!

Like this affirmation?
Get it on something you will see every day!

Operation Affirmation – Day 26

Affirmations are a way for us to harness the mind’s power by directing your intentions toward our best selves and our happiest lives.

Say this phrase to yourself all day long. Write it down, email it to yourself, and post it where you will see it all day.

Love your day, love yourself, love your life!

Like this affirmation?
Get it on something you will see every day!