Tips for Coping With Fibromyalgia

Are you looking for some everyday tips for coping with FM symptoms? You’re not alone.

About 3 – 5 percent of the population suffer from the pain and fatigue of FM. There is no “pill” to end your symptoms (yet?). But there are ways of managing them so they don’t disrupt your busy life as much.

Why Is Coping With Fibromyalgia Important?

Learning how to self-manage fibromyalgia symptoms with exercise and other lifestyle habits is vital to improve your mood, improve your sleep, and get relief from pain. For example, many people with FM are often caring for others, either by parenting or care giving for an older loved one. Yet they allow little time to take care of their own health and well-being. This is a problem because a chronic disease such as FM comes with a whole set of limitations. Those limitations stem from tender points, chronic fatigue, and ongoing pain and stiffness.

The limitations can be lessened if you get the facts: learn more about the disease and how it’s treated; seek the latest information on FM and lifestyle habits; get answers to your questions and take proactive steps to focus on your health.

With increased support, you can work towards getting your life and priorities in order. It is not an easy thing to do, and it may take a lot of experimentation until you get it right for you.

Here are some simple coping strategies which you might find useful to help yourself live well with FM:

  • Minimize stress in your life. There’s speculation that stress may play an important role in triggering FM symptoms. In fact, many people report feeling anxious, nervous, and panicked around the time when symptoms flare. Some experts find that when patients reduce stress in their lives, they also experience a reduction in depression, anxiety, and fatigue. Sleep becomes more restful and their minds relax. Because they feel more in control, the symptoms that were once immobilizing subside, and quality of life improves.
  • Remove yourself emotionally from stressful situations. Sometimes, people magnify problems, making them seem far greater than they are. The stress reaction is triggered by perception. When you imagine something to be a “life or death situation,” even though in reality it isn’t, your body reacts as if you are in danger. Work at tempering your emotions as problems come up throughout the day. Instead of seeing every crisis as “horrible,” learn to view life’s interruptions as “inconvenient, but tolerable.” Meditation and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can be useful to help you learn to do this. You will find that when you see life as something that you can easily handle, you will not feel overpowered when trouble comes.
  • Make job site modifications. To keep working part-time or full-time, you must stay mentally and physically able to handle your job responsibilities (and we know it is not easy!). But to avoid stress and anxiety, you may need to allow more time during the day to get your responsibilities done. Talk to your employer and work out a flexible schedule that allows you to come in later and leave later. Or ask your employer if you can work at home two mornings a week so you can get more rest or take a nap at lunch time to boost your energy. Whatever modifications you make, avoid procrastination. Budget your time, follow your daily “to do” lists, and limit your outside commitments on work days.
  • Work to improve communication skills. Communication is also important with a chronic condition like FM. Open and honest communication helps decrease conflict between you and your spouse, family, friends, and co-workers. This is especially true when you feel angry or resentful over having unending pain and fatigue. The mental distraction can hinder productive communication. If you feel overwhelmed with the stress, psychological counseling can help you develop appropriate and functional communication strategies to deal with your disease and other issues in your life. Sometimes just talking to some-one, who is not your family or friend, can be a relief in itself.
  • Learn to say “no.” Failing to set personal limits or not saying “no” to too many demands will put you in overload. That will add to your already elevated stress level. To help yourself say “no” to a persuasive friend think through the situation before you answer. Check your calendar, and weigh the alternatives. Involve family members or friends in the discussion about what to do. Would another commitment stop you from getting the rest, exercise, and relaxation you need to feel well? Would it interfere with the priorities that are high on your list? The desire to help others is commendable. But being all things to all people may be hindering your healing and making you feel resentful, tired, and depressed. It’s important to take a firm stand, say “no,” and mean it.
  • Keep a daily journal. Writing in a journal every day can become a great tool for self inquiry (or, like me, a blog). Some people are able to identify a series of events that are associated with the beginning of FM symptoms. That can help them understand how and when symptoms start. Keeping a journal can also assist you in tracking your muscle pain and fatigue and in identifying what may cause them. For example, you may write in your journal that you are having great pain and feeling exhausted after doing yard work for several days. Months later, you might look back on this entry and perhaps recognize a pattern that identifies a relationship between your increased symptoms and certain lifestyle triggers. Or perhaps you haven’t slept well in days. Looking back over your journal may enable you to see any emotional or physical problems that have contributed to your sleep problem.
  • Soak in a warm bath. Soaking in a warm bath, hot tub, or sauna or standing under a warm shower will serve two purposes. First, it will help you to relax tense muscles, reduce pain, and move more easily. Second, some studies show that the warm, moist heat may raise levels of endorphins and decrease levels of stress hormones. There may be an additional benefit as well. Health care professionals that specialize in sleep disorders have found that a warm bath before bedtime can help sleep be more restful.
  • Exercise regularly. According to the Arthritis Foundation, exercising regularly is important to ease symptoms of FM. Because of the pain, tender points, ongoing fatigue, and stiffness felt by FM sufferers, many have become physically unfit. Aerobic or conditioning exercises — such as walking, swimming, and biking — have analgesic and antidepressant effects. Aerobic exercise can help enhance your sense of well-being and feeling of being in control.
  • Eliminate or reduce caffeine intake. Caffeine is one of the few food products that can induce a stress response. Too much caffeine can greatly increase nervousness, anxiety, and insomnia. As you make plans to de-stress your life, try limiting the amount of caffeine you take in. And remember, coffee is not the only source of caffeine. Tea and chocolate (BUM!) also contain caffeine.
  • Use mind/body tools for relaxation. There are many relaxation techniques you can use to ease daily tension, anxiety, and pain. You might learn to relax with guided imagery, visualization, meditation, progressive muscle relaxation, deep abdominal breathing, self-hypnosis, or biofeedback. When you meditate and experience the relaxation response, your body is allowed permission to switch from the pumping “fight or flight” response into a calmer more peaceful mood. Studies show that when you step back from problems and use mind/body tools to relax, you produce brain waves consistent with serenity and happiness. In addition, talk with a counselor about ways to minimize negative self talk so you can become more optimistic about yourself and your illness.
  • Evaluate your sleep hygiene. Make sure your body is totally prepared for rest. You can’t sleep if there is light in your room or if a TV is blaring in another room. Make sure your room is quiet, dark, and cool. Use earplugs if you are sensitive to noise, and wear an eye mask to block light. Eliminate afternoon caffeine from your diet, and exercise regularly – although not near bedtime. Sometimes a snack that’s high in carbohydrates can help induce sleep because it boosts levels of serotonin in your body.
  • Consider joining a FM support group. Support groups are geared toward meeting the needs of people with FM. Support groups, which are often educational, are not psychotherapy groups. But they do provide patients and their families with a safe and accepting environment where they can vent their frustrations, share their personal stories, and receive comfort and encouragement from others. Ask your physician for some recommendations or check with the Arthritis Foundation for support groups in your area.
  • Make time for YOU each day. Work for an overall lifestyle balance. Make time to do the things you “want” to do as well as the things you “have” to do. FM sufferers are faced with special demands that other healthy people do not have. The task of coping with pain and fatigue each day makes it necessary to keep your priorities in order so you have the energy to reach your daily goals.

I do not suggest that any of this is easy to incorporate into your life. It WILL take time. You WILL need to practice. And, if you’re lucky, your friends and family can help.


  1. Thank you for sharing this. I am newly diagnosed.

  2. I have recently been diagnosed and have been reading your blog regularly. I have learned quite a bit about FM from you and am very appreciative of it. After reading symptoms, I realized that I have been misdiagnosed for years now. I started having abnormal body movements(twitches) that started mildly and progressively worsened.
    They thought I had Huntingtons but test results were negative, thank God. Realized I was drinking 4-5 pots of coffee a day with 2 tsp of sugar per cup. I cut out the caffiene and went on antidepressants due to being married.
    They tried to tell me I had a Conversion Disorder over some trauma in my life. Had to dissapoint them by explaining that I had dealt with all the bad things and had counseling when needed.
    Then in Jan 2010 I had to have my aortic valve replaced with a mechanical one. In July my husband had to have his kidney removed due to cancer. The day I brought him home from Hospital I started coughing up blood because of my ex Dr. had doubled my warfarin after giving me an antibiotic for bronchitis. I was back in hospital for 12 days and had to have lung surgery to remove all the blood. I was super stressed over my husband being home alone, even though our daughter-in-law went daily to be there while he showered in case he fell again.
    Before my 2nd hospital stay I had been doing really well in rehab and was taking care of my pool and grandkids and starting to feel real good except for lower back pain. That has been diagnosed as Severe Disc Degeneration which will only get worse. Have slowly been trying to get back to my old self when my husband had to start dialysis last Feb. We have to go about 40 miles one way and he has it for four hours three times a week.I would have to sit in the freezing building or the car for the time we were there. Def did not help my depression or anything else.
    I finally was able to get him on antidepressants several months ago and that helped his outburst of anger some. This last month he has been without and has also had to start riding the bus due to financial difficulties. He has not been happy and his outbursts have gotten worse. Thank God he goes back to Dr this Wed with a note from me telling Dr to put him back on them, plus anxiety and muscle relaxers, which unfortunately are part of my medical cocktail daily.
    This has been a rough summer with trying to take cae of him, my pool, the grandkids and go to Curves. The stress hasn’t gone well and my legs are so very very tired all the time. Once he is on meds it will ease a bit because now he is riding the bus and I just take and pick him up. It gives me the time to clean my house which has been terribly neglected between me being over there and the fibro causing me to be too tired
    .We had a yard sale today and I was in and out, up and down stairs all day in the wind. So feeling a little sorry for myself as I have already taken 15oo mg of Naproxen and my last muscle relaxer till Wednesday.
    I know this was awfully long and I didn’t mean to go on so long, but having a bad day today between back and fm.
    I did not do much yesterday resting for today and will not be doing anything for the next two.
    If you actually do read this without being bored I just want to thank you for all of the research you have done on FM.
    Thanks and lets hope there are better days ahead! 🙂

    • I’d say you NEED to take a little time for yourself – I know it’s hard (especially with all your responsibilities) but YOU are the most important. So, while not doing anything for the next day or two (I assume you’ll be having a flare due to over-doing it), light some candles, play some relaxing music, lock the door and have a long bath or sit and watch a ‘crier’ of a movie; but do it alone and do it for yourself!

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